صرف الغضب وقمعه

[MohMath03]

تدبير صرف الغضب وقمعه
الوسائل الدفاعية
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عَنِ ابْنِ عُمَرَ عَنِ النَّبِىِّ -صلى الله عليه وسلم- أَنَّهُ قَالَ « أَلاَ كُلُّكُمْ رَاعٍ وَكُلُّكُمْ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْ رَعِيَّتِهِ فَالأَمِيرُ الَّذِى عَلَى النَّاسِ رَاعٍ وَهُوَ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْ رَعِيَّتِهِ وَالرَّجُلُ رَاعٍ عَلَى أَهْلِ بَيْتِهِ وَهُوَ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْهُمْ وَالْمَرْأَةُ رَاعِيَةٌ عَلَى بَيْتِ بَعْلِهَا وَوَلَدِهِ وَهِىَ مَسْئُولَةٌ عَنْهُمْ وَالْعَبْدُ رَاعٍ عَلَى مَالِ سَيِّدِهِ وَهُوَ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْهُ أَلاَ فَكُلُّكُمْ رَاعٍ وَكُلُّكُمْ مَسْئُولٌ عَنْ رَعِيَّتِهِ ». صحيح مسلم .

عَنْ أَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ أَنَّ رَجُلًا قَالَ لِلنَّبِيِّ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ أَوْصِنِي قَالَ: لَا تَغْضَبْ فَرَدَّدَ مِرَارًا قَالَ لَا تَغْضَبْ . صحيح البخاري

تأتي أهمية الغضب من بين الأعراض النفسانية بسبب شيوعه وتفشّيه في مختلف شرائح الناس، وبسبب عواقبه الوخيمة التي يجب تجنبها.
يرجع الغضب إلى سببين:
أ- كثرة احتكاك الناس ببعضهم.
ب- طبع الضجر وسرعة الاهتياج عند الإنسان.

تدبير الغضب من خارج النفس:
يتم تدبير الغضب بطريقين: الأول من خارج النفس، والثاني من داخل النفس.

يقوم تدبير الغضب من خارج النفس على اتخاذ الغضبان بطانة مهمتها:
أ- وعظه وتذكيره بفضيلة الصفح.
ب- الشفاعة لمن يريد الغضبان معاقبته.

تدبير الغضب من داخل :
يقوم تدبير الغضب من داخل النفس على اتخاذ حيلٍ تعدُّ من أجل استرجاعها في الوقت المناسب للاتعاظ بها، فلا يتطور الغضب إلى شكله المَرَضي.
يقترح البلخي أنواعاً من هذه الحيل ( الوسائل الدفاعية ) تلخّص بما يأتي:
1- أن يفكر بأن ضبط الغضب يسهل عليه في أول اهتياجه، بخلاف ما إذا تركه يتمكن منه، فيرجع إلى هذه الفكرة في أول ما يحسُّ من نفسه حركة الغضب.
2- أن يفكِّر بالآثار السلبية للغضب على النفس والبدن، وربما أدت إلى ما يصعب شفاؤه من الأمراض. فيكون بالنتيجة الألم الذي يلحقه بنفسه أكبر من شفاء غيظه والإساءة إلى غيره.
3- أن يفكر في أن غضبه قد يعود عليه بالندم، كما كان ذلك من أمر كثيرٍ ممن عاد عليهم بأعظم الضرر الديني والدنيوي، فلم يتهيأ لهم تدارك ما جنوه.
4- أن يفكر في فضيلة الحلم وأنه أشرف المناقب التي يوصف بها العظماء الذين استعملوا العفو والصفح، فيقارن بين ما يقضيه من وطر الغضب بالانتقام و ما تكسب نفسه من فضيلة الحلم. فهذا مما ينفعه استرجاعه وقت هيجان الغضب.
5- أن يفكر في أن شدة الانتقام تنفر قلوب الرعية، وأن الانقياد الظاهر لا يكسب إلا الأحقاد، بينما يوجب العفو خلاف ذلك من المحبة. والطاعة من داخل هي المطلوبة، لأنها طاعة المحبة وهي المجدية في علاقات الناس. بينما الطاعة من خارج هي طاعة الرهبة. وهذه لا تجدي نفعاً.
6- أن يفكر بأن من يغضب عليه من رعيته إذا كان متمكناً منه فإنه يتهيأ له عقابه متى أحب، فليس لإيذاء نفسه بالغضب معنى، فالأجدى أن يسكِّن غضبه، وينتظر فتوره ثم يفكر بما أغضبه بعين الإنصاف فيستفيد: تحصيل رتبة الحلم، وبلوغ المراد في التغيير والإنكار متى أحب.
7- أن يفكر في أن رعاياه لا يمكن لهم أن يقصدوا الإساءة إليه، وإنما غلبتهم شهوتهم وتقصيرهم. وهذا لا يخلو منه أحد، فعليه أن يرحم ضعف نفوسهم.
8- أن يفكر في أنه إذا عاد إلى نفسه فسوف يجد أن التقصير الذي من أجله يغضب على غيره لا يخلو هو من نوعٍ من أنواعه، فليس من الإنصاف أن يشتد غيظه على ما هو شريك لغيره فيه.
9- أن يفكر فيما إذا كان للمغضوب عليه سالف إحسان، فيشفع سابق الإحسان للاحق الإساءة.
10- تجنب لقاء من أغضبه والنظر في وجهه، حتى تخف حدة الغضب مع الزمن

[karima.t]

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